If One Winged Angel from Final Fantasy 7 started playing on full blast out of the blue, and I didn't know where it came from, I would instantly piss myself and my life would flash before my eyes... so I think Sephiroth deserves this spot.

This guy also looks like he means business--he's in all black, he's got bombs on him, he works for stealth corps... stay away from this man too if you aren't on his good side.

DON'T FUCK WITH A MAN WHO HAS A BLACK BELT IN MARTIAL ARTS. Trust me, I'm still on the run from Sensei James after quitting his class.

I put Ken above Ryu solely because he has a funnier haircut.

If you don't understand why I'm putting Mewtwo here, watch Detective Pikachu (2019) and then come back.

I missed an opportunity not putting Zero Suit Samus in 69, didn't I? Seriously, though, she's serious. She has a giant mech suit and if she CHOOSES to beat your ass instead, then it's probably not gonna be a good day for said ass.

I would put this higher on the silliness scale than Samus for falling into the esteemed "does not need to exist" section of the Smash roster, but... I dunno, she looks pretty menacing...

Samus can probably kill you in one blast. Not you, as in your Smash main, Smash characters are strong--I mean you in real life. Think about that.

I don't like thinking about Xenoblade, it makes me feel like an angry, balding Twitter gamer. And as for Mythra, I personally feel like taking a cold shower after just looking at her--she and Pyra are simply the quintessential examples of anime girls that grody, sweaty guys like to fawn over... but that doesn't mean anything in regards to how I feel about them! I just mean they're a little hard to talk about. But I'll get into these two anyway, just for you, internaut! ❤

Listen, I'm writing these two particular entries while going back and finishing this list after E3 2021, and I've grown in terms of these lists since I first started writing this one after Min Min's debut! That means it's my responsibility to think about my placements a bit more. I put Pyra and Mythra this far down because, unlike a lot of the other characters on this list, I decided to look a bit into their roles in the game's story... and I ended up finding out that a lot of the game is about them searching for a way to die because they both feel like a burden to others. ...Jeez.

Listen, I haven't played any Castlevania games except for the one on NES, but I am led to believe that he has a chain, and I'm too scared to predict what he would do with it. Maybe kick our asphalt?